New Year, New Dedication To Blogging

I see that my last post was from October, and I wonder if anyone still checks here for updates. I got lazy and stopped posting for a few reasons, most notably the continuing slide in my cash games. Since it's a new year, I've decided to try to blog at least once a week as I think it helps me recall hands and see what/if I could've done better.

As you may already know, the downward slide continues. Since my last post, I've had only two (yes, two) positive cashouts in cash games. I am in the worst rut in the past three years, it's gotten so bad that I have become gun shy while playing and I think that's making it worse since I am not getting value like I should for hands. I simply cannot make a hand stick - I've lost to so many 2, 3, and 4 out miracles that I just expect it now. I know this is bad for my game, as once you've lost positivity your game suffers. A few examples of my horrible run:

In the $40 satellite at Dave's, got about 9k in front of me. Blinds T$75/$150. I limp from early position with 77. Yosh calls. Dave raises to $500 from the SB. Dave doesn't raise much, and I know he has a big hand to raise out of position into two people that he knows will likely call him. I call, Yosh calls. Flop J-7-3 two spades. I check, Yosh checks, Dave bets T$1400. I call, Yosh bails. Turn is a 4c. Dave leads for T$4400. I shove, he snap calls and rolls over AA. River? Oh yeah, two outered. Ad FTW.

In the BB at River Pete's $1/$1 game. Get dealt 48c. Few limpers, I check in and flop comes A95 all clubs. I check the flush, Cindy bets $11. I flat, everyone else bails. Turn is the 2s. I check expecting her to bet, she checks behind. River? 9d. I just know that card fucked me, so I check. She bets $20. I should've folded for a few reasons - Cindy is unlikely to bet without either a higher flush or a boat, AND I've been running so horrible. I decide to just call and she declares BOAT and rolls over 55. I show my flush and muck and everyone is astonished that she didn't stack me. This is a spot where my shitty run saved me money, as if I was running good I would've raised her and probably got stacked as she at no point in the universe will fold a set, even if she knows she is beat.

Also at Pete's $1/1. In middle position get dealt AJh. Raise to $3, Pete snaps it up to $11. He likes to three bet me a lot, and I don't give him credit for much of a hand. I call the $11 and it's just us to the flop of J-7-2. I check, he bets $16. I know he whiffed this, and I'm positive my J is good. I call. Turn is the 3d. I check, Pete shoves in for $40. I call. River 4d and Pete says "The Nuts" and rolls over AQd for the runner runner flush. So, on the flop he must catch a Q or runner runner flush making me roughly a 7.5 to 1 favorite (or about 99.9999999999995% to lose as things are currently going). Again, you can argue the best hand preflop won, but no one is folding AJh in a cash game AND I had the hand read perfectly. If the flop comes Q-J-2 I don't call his bet.

In the BB at Aaron's, been getting my ass kicked all day at PLO/Hold'em mix. I have $12 left and get dealt A-Q-10-8 two hearts. I raise and Aaron pots. I shove in my $12 and he calls with A-K-K-7 also two hearts. I have his flush draw dominated. Flop comes Q-8-2 two spades. I pummeled the flop and fully expect to lose. I declare "deuce on the turn and I brick the river". Sure enough, a two drops on the turn and then the 7c on the river and I am out.

It goes on and on. These are just a few recent examples. I've been adjusting my game but I just can't seem to stop the leakage. I've been thinking hard about this and have come to a few conclusions. I've decided not to play any more NL cash games with CPMG players. There's a few reasons for this. First, the more I think about it the more ridiculous it seems to keep sitting at a table full of people who are either at or beyond my skill level when I can sit with morons at casinos or Nautica. These people all know me, have reads on my play, and are much better equipped to outplay me than tourists or fish. If I went into a casino and saw a table of regulars who all knew each other and a table of guys in suits throwing money around, I would sit with the tourists. I will (of course) play limit or mix games, but sitting at any NL with group members is a suicide run. I will still play tournaments, but I expect to slowly scale back my involvement in the CPMG. I've been there for at least four years, and I have a lot of friends in the group, but I just cannot make money in those games.

There is also a LOT of shit talking going on behind my back. Apparantly there are people who not only feel they are better than me at poker BUT they feel the need to talk loads of shit about me when I am not there. They don't think I hear about it, but the one thing people like more than listening to someone run their mouth is to tell me "So and so said you're fucking horrible, you're welcome at his game anytime, etc etc". I get texts all the time like "X asked us how we could let you cash out with money" and so on. I'm all for drama, but why willingly subject myself to it? I am aware that most group members feel that I am a horrible player (and they may be correct) but it's bad business to tap on the fish tank fellas. I'm not naming any names, I'm sure if you regularly attend games you know who runs their mouth.

I am rededicating myself to poker. My goal was (and still is) to become a good enough cash player (and establish a large enough bankroll) to be able to support myself with my card playing. I don't think I could be a pro, but with enough work I do think I could make a consistent profit and be able to afford the things I want. I don't expect I'll be able to do this consistently at NL until I vastly improve my game. Rather than blow a few buyins at Dave's, I am going to start taking regular trips to Pittsburgh to kill the $4/8 limit game. I can make enough there to supplement my game until I have a large enough roll to stab at the $1/3 again. (Yes, Greg, I am aware that is actually backwards of the normal strategy of taking stabs at NL to establish a solid limit bankroll).

Look for more updates next week as I intend to blog even if I haven't attended a game that week. To those of you who read this and are my friends, have a good new year and play well. The rest of you? Well, fuck you too.